Shoreless Ocean, you stretch far before me.
The nearest and farthest reaches of sight
Are filled with pristine blue and foamy white,
The mirror of the vast sky above thee.
The birds drink your water that makes blind see.
Your surface glows even at dark of night.
Your tide ever sweeps with glory and might.
If drowned in your depths, alive I would be...
Yet I lie here in my arid sand pit.
Like a beached whale, I sit here and wait
For the tide to come and wash me away.
If I could only get one finger wet...
The tide waits on me and it's getting late.
I fear I'll yet thirst at passing of day.
6 comments:
Wow, I love this.....
Dang it, I miss the ocean.
Who made the rules of syllables in the first place and who decided that whale was a one syllable word? A completely infallible human being? Because if the rules of syllables were created and not discovered by human minds than there is always room for change and nothing is set in stone. Once we choose to follow everything that people smarter than us decide, we ignorantly accept anything just because someone wrote it down and said it was true. If it's not made by God, inspired by God, or decided by God then there is no reason that it can't be incorrect.
And anyways, it was not Petrarch who began the Italian sonnet. He just improved it.
I said Petrarch began the Italian sonnet?
Anyway, we could go back and forth on this forever...but you're so convinced you're improving this fallable ancient form then it'll soon be Dillonian sonnet, so that's cool I guess.
Ok, I never said anything against the Italian sonnet! I told you that I did it wrong and it wasn't a real one. The only thing that I think is wrong is that the word whale is considered to have just one syllable. That's the only thing I'm arguing!
Aha, I see you and the sonnet have become aquainted now. the sonnet is in good company. One of these days i will take a shot at it. But dang it kate, no way i can meet up to the greatness you create. I plan on reading your stuff to my kids some day! :)
We gotta catch up soon!!
Luv ya.
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