Word Art

I made these for some family members for Christmas. I then transferred them to canvas using a brilliant and fascinating method taught to me by Cass VanB.

Romans 12:2 for Dad

Micah 6:8 for Mom

Ecclesiastes 3:11 for little baby D

For Real

"Nothing, there is nothing yet in truest form

We walk like ghosts upon the earth

The ground it groans"

"The Fall," by Gungor from Ghosts Upon the Earth

"I believe you're more real, than what my eyes can see, 

I believe the hills are full of a mighty angel army"

"God of the Angel Armies," Jonathan David Helser

"Cobb: She had locked something away, something deep inside her. The truth that she had once known, but... she chose to forget. Limbo became her reality. 
Ariadne: What happened when you woke up? 
Cobb: To wake up from that after, after years, after decades... after we'd become old souls thrown back into youth like that... I knew something was wrong with her. She just wouldn't admit it. Eventually, she told me the truth. She was possessed by an idea, this one, very simple idea, that changed everything. That our world wasn't real. That she needed to wake up to come back to reality, that, in order to get back home, we had to kill ourselves."

Inception (the film, 2010)

"For now we see obscurely in a mirror, but then it will be face to face. Now I know partly; then I will know fully, just as God has fully known me. 

I Corinthians 13:12

"For we are not struggling against human beings, but against the rulers, authorities and cosmic powers governing this darkness, against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realm."

Ephesians 6:12

It's not a mistake that this generation is becoming more and more aware of the spirit realm, the reality of what is (most times) invisible. If I were to take a little more time, I could find more examples of songs, movie quotes and pop culture references within and without Judeo-Christian expression that nod to the realm that is "other than" what we see and touch. 


Just the other day a blonde athletic-looking man in an oversized business suit in his later 30's approached me at the coffee shop I work. Wondering why he was lingering by the counter, I asked if I could do anything for him. "I took some halucinogens the other night and I think they messed with my brain chemistry..." (didn't see that one coming). I continued to ask and probe and he continued to talk to me about he believes in the "physical and spiritual plane" and that they are connected, he believes in God, heaven and hell, even Yeshua. How does this all connect? He believes these things and yet is looking for a higher experience; clearly he wasn't satisfied with just a stockpile of knowledge. 


Another person at the mall, when asked about his religious background, said he believes in God, yet he had traveled the world and studied under some of the most renown Buddhist and Hindu thinkers and sages. He seemed to not have found "it" yet, but questioned the sincerity and motives of the Christian offer of the experience of God. 


We all are yearning for transcendent experience. Yet the source of that experience matters more than anything. We all know there is a reality of worlds and being that are other than the kingdom-phylum-class-order-family-genus species we experience each day with our five senses. God, reveal yourself to us, to me, to my people. Open up our senses beyond the five sight-smell-hearing-touch-taste, that we could sense You, know the truth, and the spiritual realities of good and evil that affect everything we do. Satisfy our hungry hearts by showing Yourself as the One who is more real than the ground I'm standing on, more real than the breath in my lungs.

"You're more real than the wind in my lungs

You're more real than the ground I'm standing on

You're thoughts define me, you're inside me

You're my reality

Abba,I belong to you"

"Abba," Jonathan David Helser

I love your house; it's so architectural.

Sometimes someone goes and writes something that I've been wanting to write, but way better than I ever could have. This is the case with this blog post by Michael Gungor. 

He writes a very accessible and well-constructed evaluation of the Christian music industry. In light of the Burst Into Song You Mtns. project (That will happen. One day. When we get to it, eventually.), some of his points were really well-spoken and a synthesis of a lot of what we've all observed.

For those of you without the time or energy to read the whole thing, here are notable quotes, in my opinion:

"I had a conversation with John Mark McMillan last night about something that I think is very interesting. By the way, I consider John Mark to be one of the ones I consider to be making a valiant effort in transcending some of these imposed limitations in this industry. But he mentioned to me how strange it is that people keep calling his new album “creative.” That word is actually one of the most used words when people describe our music as well. In fact, I bet some of you reading this have described as such. Here’s the weird thing about this…
Why do you find it necessary to say that?

Do you notice that nobody really uses that word about other types of music? I just was perusing some Itunes user reviews to see if this holds up. I checked John Mark and mine, and “creativity” is very often found. But it’s not often found in reviews of bands like Sigur Ros, Bon Iver, Radiohead, Sufjan Stevens or other artists who are certainly very “creative.”

Nobody goes to an art gallery and says, “boy, that painting is so creative.” Why? Because it’s art! Of course it’s creative! Why else would it be there? It’s very nature is creativity. Or like Lisa pointed out to me today, “that would be like saying, I love your house, it’s so architectural.”

But when someone in the Christian industry actually takes their art seriously, everybody is like “holy crap, listen to how creative it is!”

"Yes money matters. But so does beauty. Art actually makes a difference in the world. Have the courage to actually make decisions on values and not simply on past numbers and trends. And for crying out loud, if it really is good, the numbers will follow eventually anyway."

Can I get an amen?

The Lonely Life of an Apostle

Donald Miller is the only current pop Christian writer who I still like and would recommend. This excerpt from his book, Searching for God Knows What provides insight into the humanness of apostle Paul that I never would have seen (but man, I wish I did. Then I would be rich and famous and popular among the trendy Christian community. One day...).

If you don't have the time or energy to read the whole thing, read these:
"For the first couple of days in a new town, Paul probably felt completely alone. I see him like this when he talks about how he wants to go home and be in heaven but stays on earth so he can write letters and preach. I see him writing by candlelight at a stranger’s table when he talks about how he has this thorn in his flesh and can’t get over it and prayed about it three times, but God said to him, “My grace is sufficient for you.”
 ... the guy was passionate, like he actually believed this stuff was true, always going off about heaven and hell because he knew life has extremes. One minute he talked about how disgusting sin is and how it hurts God in His heart, and the next minute he said he would go to hell for people if he could, how he would die for them and go to hell if they would just trust Christ. It’s really hard to read that stuff because it gets you feeling guilty about not loving people very much, and then you feel very thankful for people like Paul because it means that if a person knows Christ, they become the sort of man who says difficult truths with his mouth and yet feels things with his heart that make him want to go around and die for people. It’s quite beautiful, really."

yet untitled

A little girl darkened the door of the old cathedral at dawn. That is to say, her shadow was cast across its towering doors as the morning beams of orange and warmed pink creeped up over the horizon and onto the stone sidewalk behind her.

Ding-dong

The resonant sound of the bells inside the echoing walls of the God-aimed monstrosity made her jump slightly as she pulled the ringer rope.

 A man in a grey robe opened the the door with an overdrawn creak.

"Welcome, little one; we've been expecting you."

She gazed up at him, eyes widely soaking in his wrinkled, over-sized countenance.

"Expecting me?" she inquired as she cocked her head at a jaunty, inquisitive angle, "I just came here to wonder if anyone would like to buy a flower." She gestured with her bent arm upon which dangled a wicker basket filled with cut chrysanthemums.

The clergyman chuckled to himself. "Yes! If flowers were prayers then you could call this place an arboretum! Then again, perhaps flowers are prayers..." his thoughts seemed to trail off as he squinted at the morning light that now bathed him. Seemingly regaining his state of mind he motioned her in with a wave. "Anyhow, come on inside, young one. "

The girl gave a tug to the bottom of her tightly buttoned yellow cardigan (quite matter-of-factly) and trotted lightly yet intentionally inside.

"If prayers were flowers," she began, dinner plate eyes scanning the cavernous enclosure, moving up one wall, across the domed ceiling and down the stained glass on the other side, "then I would make a much more notable profit with my business."

"Oh, yes?" he inquired.

"You see, my expenses to produce would be nothing, and I would never run out-- in and out of season!"

Again, he laughed to himself, though this time more loudly and lively. "I am happy to have found that sprouted youth who kneel before the Holy One are still being cultivated in this day and age."

"You should be," she stated emphatically. "My mother says that our people are going to hell in a hand basket. That's why I've decided to carry flowers in mine."

With a grin the man of the church plucked a dark red mum from said basket and brought it to his nose. "With some baskets of flowers and prayers, perhaps there is hope after all," he spoke dreamily, as he exhaled the fragrance of the mum with enjoyment.

...

 

Sweet!

Scientist Mohamed Babu from Mysore, India captured beautiful photos of these translucent ants eating a specially colored liquid sugar. Some of the ants would even move between the food resulting in new color combinations in their stomachs.


from visualamor


p.s. this is the sort of thing that makes me think i might switch from blogger to tumblr. it's a much more convenient sharing machine. 

I told you so.

(that I would get back to writing. it's not a story but it's something.)



Drink of My Tears
 
You squeeze out my tears into Your bottle again.
My spirit responds to You with watered eyes;
the arrows of your eyes pierce my thunderhead.
Tears like rain washing down a dirty wall
descend my face
like the way You wash over my tarnished heart.
Jesus, Jesus, drink of my tears.
I see You hanging on the wood;
You thirst.
Here, Jesus, drink;
drink of my tears.
They can't help but fall
when You move,
when You walk into the room.


The Island
 
I swam out to a lonely island
in a gray sea
under a thickly misted sky.
I felt cold;
there was no one with me.

The water, like abandoned dreams
and people who left us,
kept me cold.

My breaststrokes divided the water
as I propelled myself under it.
No longer did I walk the shores
of this sea of lonliness.
I set out to find You.

You set my feet upon a rock
wide enough for me to stand.
I was surrounded by water but
You gave me solid ground beneath my feet.

Patient patient patient One,
Why'd You leave me waiting here?

You said that You have not forgotten me;
emphatically so.

Unrocked, unwrecked, yet unwritten
alone here,
alone there, with you, somewhere.

Cyclone of light, I see it coming down.
Suck me up into higher places;
make me to transcend this place
for You are more real than here.
Take me up from this lonely island.

The reality of You whispers above the roar of the silence,
and if I can't see You, I look for You inside my heart.
For even when there is no ground or light,
I hold onto You-- I cling to You
like there's nothing else
for there. is. nothing. else.

Suspended in darkness
or raptured in light
I can't flee from You,
for when I run
You chase me.

Writing Again

{The best writing advice D.Mill has ever received.}

I would like to actually start writing again. That's the whole reason Malapropisms exists anyway.




On that note, for those of you who didn't catch the update on Arrows of Hope...

Attention all poets, writers, artists, and prose-producing thinkers:

You are invited to participate in the first edition of the community literary magazine, The Circadian.

We will be accepting submissions in the following categories: short stories, essays (creative nonfiction, passionate theological essay, comic blog post, etc.), short plays or screenplays, poetry, graphics and visual art (most likely black and white print capabilities only).

Submit in as many categories as you’d like. Please limit yourself to two submissions per category.  All poets are requested to include three poems per submission, unless your poem is extraordinarily long.  If your writing doesn’t neatly fit into one of the three categories, submit it anyway and suggest your own category. Full theses or dissertations will not be accepted, however, due to space considerations.

The deadline for submissions is January 1.

All further questions can be addressed to Susan or Kait via email.

Susan: arrowofhope@yahoo.com

Kait: kaitlyn.rockrohr@gmail.com

Too true.

InsideOut

 InsideOut

fighting against what is with a mighty weapon:
faces.
see: the people
working toward
of, by, for.


grow up when want i to be a street artist i.

Paul's take on the Law

"Any teaching by Paul and the Law must take note of his key foundational statements in relation to Torah as God's revelation, as well as a reflection of His eternal standard of right and wrong. So far as the Law reflects this eternal standard of God, it is irrevocable. As such we should note there verses:

• Romans 3:31-- faith established the Law. "Do we then overthrow the law by this faith? By no means! On the contrary, we uphold the law."
• Romans 3:2 states that the Law is a gift of God.
• Romans 3:7 teaches that the Law defines what sin is, while Romans 6:1-2 says we are not to continue to sin.
• Romans 7:12 states that the Law is holy. "The commandment is holy and just and good."
• Romans 7:14 states that the Law is spiritual; 7:16 that the Law is good.

In the Law the great wisdom of God's standards is revealed. Only the Bible reveals an infinite, personal, ethical God!"

Dan Juster, Jewish Roots, "Paul, Israel and the Law"

Baby Albums from Lowercase Noises

First there was...

and now there is.

Welcome to the world, Vivian. Our ears thank you for coming.

Mason Jar Music Presents

White Owl video

Hey girl, let's go down, wash our hands in the Carolina tide...

Here is a little window into my vacation at the Outer Banks with the Randy Rockrohr's 2011. What a big fat blessing! Especially since it ended pre-Irene and we returned to D.C. just post-Earthquake. 

Home is where you hang your hat. In our case, that was at the local KOA. In my case, specifically, it was the TBlakes trusty Sierra by Design. Thanks guys! We were constantly chuckling to ourselves that all the other sites had massive campers, pop-up trailers, and party buses with spinning rims and we had a minivan and a u-haul. Staying classy.

Did you hear about the new Blackbeard film that's coming out? It's rated arrr!

We took the ferry to Ocracoke island....for $FREE.99! Car and all!

It looked a little something like this.

Let's just say Rosko didn't stay dry for long. There was a lot of unanticipated dog fishing that went on.

We survived my first attempt at kayaking. Note the kayak high five. A little blurry, but you get the idea.

I sort of liked it on the island.

Special island horses of Spanish decent with one less vertebrae than a typical horse. 

This sign was seen on the side of a bait and tackle shop. The fisherman and the bird people don't necessarily get along.

On the deck of a seafood joint near our campsite, back on the banks, facing the sound.

Late night beach side campfire.

It  may be hard to tell in this pic, but this particular marshmellow was unstoppable.

On our last morning of camping we actually got up for the sunrise...

...but it's never too early for throwing it up!

maria tries her hand at some photog + we love each other.

If you've never been to East Asia, this is what it means to pose for a pic Asian-style. 

If I had an fb, this would most certainly be my new profile pic. 

I told Aunt Gee that she was being literally Christ-like. I actually don't know how I will be a clean person when I'm not around her anymore. She is the most hygienic lady I know, which also left me very impressed at her camping abilities.

And that's just scratching the surface. mm mm good. I spent some great times with the Lord on top of all the fun, and for all you JMM fans, I'm coming back like a baby.

Flowers feel like flowers.

I am still washing off the residue of Gnosticism that coats my worldview. Sometimes I find myself subconsciously delegitimizing or trying to separate myself from my emotions. For instance: There is a particular thing that I desire to do or to have that I know will require patience. I still feel the desire, yet on the other hand I want to submit to what He has for me because that's obviously best, even if I disagree in the moment.

I'm linking this to Gnosticism because of its emphasis on spirit v. matter, in which spirit is valued above the physical/material realm, the realm where we walk and talk and feel happy and sad and everything else. I'm linking feelings to the physical/material realm because they are an innate part of "humanness." With Gnostic thought, divine knowledge is exalted above the human physical experience and the goal is essentially to transcend the real world. This kind of thinking is still lurking in the church world, especially in charasmania where the end goal tends to be a transcendent, mystical experience.This has great value, but if the importance and value of day-to-day life and general humanness is de-emphasized then it's problematic.

I keep feeling the Lord point out that I am, in fact, a human being (believe it or not) and that He made human beings to feel and experience. He wants me to be in those feeling places with Him, to include him in the process, to invite Him into my heart and what I'm experiencing there. He does not expect me not to have emotional reactions nor should I deny them or experience them alone. Sometimes in Christian world we infer that we are expected to be bulletproof, unaffected by anything, which is not realistic.

Simple enough, yeah? So here is a story.

There was a job I had been pursuing for which I already had one interview. After playing phone tag with a guy from their HR dept. I was informed that I was not going to be invited back for another interview. Now, I knew that this was the Lord's sovereignty, that the door was closed on purpose. Plus, it was a position at a large company, which isn't my cup of tea. I had an ends-justify-the-mean mentality in going for the job, thinking that the ends of paying off school loans and the resulting freedom would justify the means of working for a corporation. But still.

Despite recognizing this was how it was meant to be, I still felt sad. Thoughts such as, "What did I do wrong?" and "What's wrong with me?" "Why do they hate me?" and "I'm a disgrace to the family name" murmured back stage. I told the Lord that although I accepted this outcome and trusted it was for the best, I still felt this way. I felt permission to feel what I needed to feel for a little while.

Jessica Youmans texted me to ask about the job. I told her that I didn't get it and was trusting it was the right thing, yet I tagged "but, rejection doesn't feel like flowers."

Later that night, I arrived at our small group and Jessica pointed at a vase of beautiful, freshly cut blossoms of white and green and said, "those are for you."

"What for?" I inquired.

Without skipping a beat, she said, "Because rejection doesn't feel like flowers."

Flowers feel like flowers!

Upon later reflection, not only was I touched by her kind gesture of encouragement and thoughtfulness (she picked the perfect ones! Sorry, no picture), but also I saw how the Lord really moved through her to confirm what He had been teaching me. Yes, we accept what falls from His hand. But also, we get to have the space to experience whatever that is, honestly and genuinely with Him. Disappointment, rejection, shame, guilt, anxiety, happiness, desire, passion-- He wants it all. Isn't He great to give us challenges that sharpen us, and then also surround us with people through whom He moves to comfort us and to share it with along the way?

Thank you Jessica. Thank you Jesus. Flowers feel gooooood.

Kite Party 2011

I am spoiled. Hopefully not rotten.

Some brave souls came out to celebrate with me on the hottest day of the year. My smile was so big I couldn't feel the heat.

Cass and my mom put on a whimsical and wonderful kite party for me for my bday. Maasen was kind enough to take some pics for me, the camera-less. What a blessing!

the spread

my mother's handiwork, of course. the veggies are carved into flowers, and if you can see it, i have a bday message spelled out in cheese-its.

needed more wind..but please note that big cass MADE me that kite. wawaweewa, where does all the creative energy come from?!

i am loved.

ang trys her hand at flying

my youngest brother and his friends had recently invented a new frisbee game that proved to be a hit. we spent much of the evening on this due to the lack of wind.

team rockrohrrrrrrr + sam = total domination. or, at least in the first game.

he tried so hard!

quit gabbing and play, boys.

muh girls

she made that sign. another example of her superior making skills.

cass surprised me with one of the precious figs from her tree, a truly sacrificial gift. mmm....

Father of Lights, you continue to delight me with the good and perfect gifts you shower down from above. I open my arms to you and lift up my face to feel your radiance. Thank you for my family and community and the way you overwhelm my heart through them. May we all enter into the new season of fullness, movement, joy and love as you break forth into our little world. You are blessed above every other name, and I am humbled that you would look down on me with such favor to give me all of this. Thank you for another year to live, move and have my being in You.

I love you, my friends, those who could be there and those who were there in spirit. If all I had was all of this....dayenu!

our prayer in august air

father of lights

you do not change like shifting shadows

your nearness is the august air

our skin responds in sweat

you stifle us with your heavy nearness

rain rain rain rain

our arms are wide open

our faces looking up

all these good and perfect gifts

are showers from heavenly places

you are the giver of seasons

each one purposed for its own beautiful time

we know nothing of what you have done

beginning to end

we have no idea

who are you?

who are you?

where do you live?

we make our home in you

we look for you, the unseen

we live and move and have our being

in you, the infinite

that which you have set in our hearts

we have not understood

but you stay here close like humid august air

The Cusp

Season of folly
Season of darkness
Season of telling my hands not to do
Season of crying
Season of sitting
Season, the season of waiting for you

Breaking me slowly
Watching me melting
Raking me out and wringing me dry
Left me there lonely
Dark before daylight
Then burst out like fireworks on 4th of July

Bring me in gently
Bring me in quickly
Fold me in closer to feel your embrace
Kiss me there sweetly
Gaze, ever-reaching,
Drawing me nearer to your tender face

Eloquent dignity
Shadowy mystery
Come, be drawn out; sit down next to me
Breathe on me warmly
Tell me your secrets
Let's run away somewhere no one can see

One Hand Waving Free

You danced a goofy dance with me this morning

in the holy place of my imagination.

After the Friday sun peeked slyly from under the horizon

You said You’d never give up on me.

I laughed. I cried. It was better than despairing.

Yesterday I rode my cart through the grocery store like a skate board.

Casting awkward looks aside,

I sailed, undaunted, north to the plastic cup aisle

because I don’t have a job in a month.

In the middle of the ditch

I realize I’m not so stuck.

And money, love and futuristic visions

don’t show me who I am

or secure me.

My security rests in who I know-

the You I know.

I’m running and jumping through this empty church

for no good reason

except that I’m alive and I can.

Where are we going? I don’t know.

How do we get there? C’mon,

let's go.

Songs of Water

Maybe you will enjoy this music as much as I am...



www.songsofwater.com

Asheville Music Festival 2012

I have been ecstatic and inspired by the concept of this event ever since I heard about at the Tikkun conference last month.Now their site is live!


Here's the vision for those who haven't heard:

"In the summer of 1969, forty young Jewish Yeshua-believers gathered together in Asheville, North Carolina, for what would prove to be one of the great turning points in the modern-day resurrection of Messianic Judaism. These young people conducted their own meetings, elected their own officers, and held their own teachings. As a result, the following year, the “Young Hebrew Christian Alliance” (YHCA) was officially recognized by the Hebrew Christian Alliance of America. A movement of young Jewish believers was born. Asheville ’69 activated a generation to step into callings that would awaken Messianic Judaism from its centuries-long slumber, thereby preparing the way for all Israel’s coming encounter with Messiah Yeshua.

One generation later, the movement returns to Asheville. We return with the shared vision of a music festival: a stage, a field, and over 1000 people—connected with the Messianic Jewish community in Israel and the Diaspora—young and old, gathered together for three days of live music from promising young artists within this community. This is not a conference; it is a raw, groundswell gathering that wells up out of the hearts of young people in this community, who desire nothing but to step beyond the land of “what is” into the frontier of “what can be.” Like the pivotal gathering of young Jewish believers in Asheville, North Carolina, one generation ago, it will be a harbinger and catalyst for salvation, for renewal, for unity, and vision."

I am convinced that many in my community, as well as the body in the KC area at large, have pieces to bring to the table for this. It's not only a music festival, but many art mediums including visual, poetry, dance, drama and more.

I am especially excited to discover new Messianic artists as my music selection the past few years has been hacked away by the hatchet of conviction (thanks Cass for the music project you've been pioneering). Music is spiritual. To use a phrase of Tom's, let the warrior poets arise! Let sounds resonate through the atmosphere, into the cosmos and penetrate the darkness! To me, there is a big void of quality and originality among artists who are seeking to produce edifying music. I'm excited to see a rise in creative momentum among the people of God that will define the trend for our generation! I don't really know what kinds of artists will be there and what the things they produce will look and sound like, but I am very hopeful.

Check out the AMF12 site for a bit more info, although it seems they're still in the preliminary stages and have a lot of "coming soon" type notices there.